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Tosh.0 – 2012 Tosh.0lympic Games – Uncensored

Tosh.0 – 2012 Tosh.0lympic Games – Uncensored

Posted on August 8, 2019 by Mike Harmon


(cheering) – Seventh’s not that bad. Plus, he just qualified
for the paralympics. Every four years, we
spend two weeks watching athletes compete for a
chance to be on a box of disgusting cereal
that nobody’s bought since the ’50s. Who wants to spend
two weeks in London? The food sucks, it’s
always raining, and no one looks like
Christian Bale. It’s just like Boston
with a big clock. The Olympics haven’t
been fun since ’92 when the Dream Team
destroyed every country they played by 40 points
and impregnated half the bitches in Barcelona. Yeah. It’s not a coincidence
that Spain suddenly started cranking out
beautiful mixed race ballers. The Greeks only invented
the Olympics because they needed something
to watch while eating their delicious salads. That’s why I decided to
get in on this action and do every single
sport in the Olympics in record time for the 2012
tosh point O-lympic games. – [Announcer] Here is Daniel
Tosh with an affinement warm-up routine that has
this announcer fully aroused. He loads into the
blocks in the historic tosh point O-lympiad
is under way. A ridiculously short
dash into the hurdles, into the high jump. He’s no stranger to
working the pole. Is it the shoes? Clips the crossbar. And waiting for him on
the pad is a wrestler. Let’s get it on. It’s over. Four gold so far. Can he make it five? Tosh floats like a
butterfly, stings like VD. Judo? Now he’s just piling on. (yells) It’s as if he’s been
training all morning. He looks dead. That’s gonna make
the rematch tricky. Time to throw stuff. He chucks the metal frisbee. The metal softball. Tosh races through
the field events like a ferral chested [Bleep]. Oh, hits his head
on the release. Can we see a replay? No? Okay. Forehand followed by a backhand. Then a two handed
backhand into a whatever the hell that is. A big shove. The judges aren’t
going to like that. [Bleep] It. YOLO. He clings it. He jerks it. And even has time to
get a quick nap in. This is where Tosh truly
excels, handling balls. Spikes the volleyball
right into a rented Camera. Water Polo ball fake
and a header for a goal. And look out, Dream
Team, because Daniel just brought the house down. Chalks up for gymnastics. And let’s just say
he powdered his nose for a little extra energy. Take that, G series. (whimsical flute) Just delightful. Suck a bag of tits, China. Bela Karolyi right out
to congratulate him. Must me nice to hug a man
and not a 12 year-old girl that will never have a period. That counts as equestrian? Seems like a stretch. Remember, nobody needs an
assault rifle for any reason. He’ll probably get a low
score because of that splash, but doesn’t seem to
bother him as he swims to the end of the pool and
right into sailing and rowing. And here it is, the final
leg of the Dan-cathlon. Yes, he’s done it. The judges are factoring
in time, distance, and degree of difficulty. Daniel Tosh just
made Michael Phelps look like a lazy bitch. What a great day for America. – I just completed all the
Olympic events in record time. Now can we start
football season? It’s the only sport
Americans care about. (cheering) I don’t know why everyone’s
so upset about blood doping. Makes sports so much easier. (energetic techno)

100 thoughts on “Tosh.0 – 2012 Tosh.0lympic Games – Uncensored”

  1. Josh Lucas says:
    February 9, 2018 at 10:14 pm

    you knew the weights were fake, but did you know it was rubber?
    that was hisn't acting that made it look hard

    Reply
  2. John Wolf says:
    February 9, 2018 at 10:34 pm

    He looks dead.. Thats going to make the rematch tricky! Lmao

    Reply
  3. ssskywalk3rrr says:
    February 9, 2018 at 10:57 pm

    I don't like the Olympics, but that mash up was pretty awesome!

    Reply
  4. alecthomp says:
    February 9, 2018 at 11:32 pm

    Not sure this qualifies as comedy.

    Reply
  5. Agris Phoenix says:
    February 10, 2018 at 12:13 am

    impressive

    Reply
  6. kuzz says:
    February 10, 2018 at 2:18 am

    classical one my dudes

    Reply
  7. oscar ortiz says:
    February 10, 2018 at 5:37 am

    Tosh is the Best

    Reply
  8. Amanda Mcginnis says:
    February 10, 2018 at 5:17 pm

    Thought it was "uncensored" you bunch of lying thieving bastards

    Reply
  9. corbeau says:
    February 10, 2018 at 6:26 pm

    meh

    Reply
  10. John G says:
    February 11, 2018 at 1:41 pm

    Beautiful mix raced ballers

    Reply
  11. JonnyBeoulve says:
    February 11, 2018 at 10:43 pm

    Fake. Shooting isn't in the olympics.

    Reply
  12. old news says:
    February 12, 2018 at 9:33 am

    Tosh.o just did all the Olympics sport lmao

    Reply
  13. Jacob Smith says:
    February 13, 2018 at 3:38 am

    curling?

    Reply
  14. Eric B says:
    February 13, 2018 at 4:08 am

    “Suck a bag of tits China”. Hilarious

    Reply
  15. John says:
    February 13, 2018 at 5:57 am

    Suck a bag of tits China! 😂😂😂😂

    Reply
  16. TheRealKillerTomato says:
    February 13, 2018 at 3:51 pm

    I’d just like to point out that the depicted rifle he was using is many times more deadly than an “assault rifle.”

    Reply
  17. zvxcvxcz says:
    February 13, 2018 at 5:30 pm

    Why is this being posted now? It wasn't funny in 2012 and that hasn't changed. Not only this skit, Tosh has never been funny.

    Reply
  18. The Saturday Crew says:
    February 13, 2018 at 6:24 pm

    Do you like kale? Me either!!! You'll love The Saturday Crew ep 2…. Subscribe now

    Reply
  19. Аарон Барсук says:
    February 13, 2018 at 9:00 pm

    Oh my gosh.. they FINALLY uploaded this! Thank you cc

    Reply
  20. sumting wong says:
    February 14, 2018 at 12:27 pm

    That baby bulge at 3:15

    Reply
  21. Cullen Crowder says:
    February 14, 2018 at 4:39 pm

    I love you for making laugh!

    Reply
  22. Snappa 87 says:
    February 14, 2018 at 7:35 pm

    How tosh gonna talk shit about Boston we got some of the beat places to eat in the country! Kelly's Roast Beef, Mike's Roast Beef, Pizzeria Regina.. fuck you Tosh for talking shit about Boston!!

    Reply
  23. Bilbo Baggies says:
    February 14, 2018 at 11:36 pm

    They meant the video they showed wasn’t censored

    Reply
  24. Bo ThatGuyYouDon'tKnow says:
    February 15, 2018 at 3:00 am

    Duck a bag of dicks

    Reply
  25. wealthy black man says:
    February 15, 2018 at 12:58 pm

    Could pole dancing be in the Olympic games please?? That show needs better ratings…

    Reply
  26. straitpepperdiet says:
    February 16, 2018 at 7:18 pm

    Football!

    Reply
  27. Lumpy Seal says:
    February 16, 2018 at 8:26 pm

    Love the writers on this show. That commentary was top notch

    Reply
  28. Conald "The Notorious" McPussygrabber says:
    February 18, 2018 at 4:34 am

    has anyone noticed since the banning of PEDs black people arent good at sports anymore….nfl and nba are the only sports that still allow PEDs also daniel tosh needs to stop sucking the cock of every black person he can think of a POSITIVE joke about…aids

    Reply
  29. ilikepie2448255 says:
    February 18, 2018 at 6:20 am

    Remember, nobody needs an assault rifle for any reason.

    Reply
  30. Padraig Murphy says:
    February 18, 2018 at 4:41 pm

    "LeDaniel" and then he goes straight into the powder toss lol

    Reply
  31. gracie. says:
    February 19, 2018 at 4:54 am

    I love how he did everything and did it so quickly lol XD (also I cant believe I haven’t seen people in the comments going oh my god he is so hot and sexy ohhhh look at that body. I am surprised y’all pervs didn’t do that yet. Wow)

    Reply
  32. Lix898 says:
    February 19, 2018 at 4:22 pm

    That cocaine joke is a little too on the nose.

    Reply
  33. Mark Pedersen says:
    February 23, 2018 at 12:42 am

    No Trampoline ?!!?!?!?

    Reply
  34. Clint Eastwood says:
    February 24, 2018 at 4:54 pm

    Wheaties are good

    Reply
  35. Samson Faehnrich says:
    March 1, 2018 at 5:54 am

    the Chargers need a field goal kicker, I'd sign tosh,
    I'll bet hill better than the 7 kickers we had last season…🦄🔥🍍🔥🐙

    Reply
  36. Zeke Santiago says:
    March 5, 2018 at 1:51 am

    Can we get a replay

    Reply
  37. Adofo says:
    March 8, 2018 at 12:40 am

    I am 100% positive that’s how equestrian is done CORRECTLY

    Reply
  38. Meundies says:
    March 9, 2018 at 6:42 pm

    Tosh.0 was like H3H3 and Idubbz before those channels existed

    Reply
  39. This Guy says:
    March 16, 2018 at 11:43 pm

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JdMh4jv0LMo&list=PLd9knzlzpZp5G41YruM21zN2rU-iLXPzW

    Reply
  40. Reck Ssel says:
    March 18, 2018 at 4:37 am

    He’s fu King athletic

    Reply
  41. Brendan Murtagh says:
    March 20, 2018 at 12:21 pm

    baseball was better when everyone was on the juice

    Reply
  42. alexanderj searer says:
    March 21, 2018 at 6:06 am

    winner winner winner winner

    Reply
  43. Thrill House says:
    March 23, 2018 at 1:15 am

    Your a salad.

    Reply
  44. Tommy Hosey says:
    March 23, 2018 at 1:20 am

    #2018

    Reply
  45. Johnny Bolt says:
    March 24, 2018 at 4:33 am

    Classic skit

    Reply
  46. Dennis Nedry says:
    March 24, 2018 at 12:49 pm

    Tosh I didn’t know you were part black????

    Reply
  47. NB Mr. Miyagi says:
    April 8, 2018 at 1:04 am

    Suck a bag of tits china

    Reply
  48. bear8256 says:
    April 10, 2018 at 4:11 am

    does anybody know that song at the end?

    Reply
  49. Chris Bishop says:
    April 13, 2018 at 3:20 pm

    Hahaha i wish the real olympics were exactly like this!! Good job comedy central only took ya 6 years to post this, uncensored my @$$

    Reply
  50. Francisco Valdez says:
    April 17, 2018 at 12:15 am

    Suck a bag of tits China

    Reply
  51. Joel Baker says:
    April 25, 2018 at 9:52 am

    Impregnated every bitch in Barcelona lmao

    Reply
  52. josh hacker says:
    May 5, 2018 at 12:15 am

    Remember , no one needs an assault weapon, ever…🤣

    Reply
  53. MadHatter1337 says:
    May 20, 2018 at 12:35 pm

    Mongoloid* is what they censored @2:13

    Reply
  54. Aiden Negron says:
    May 28, 2018 at 10:05 pm

    how did sailing count

    Reply
  55. jeaniebird says:
    June 3, 2018 at 10:57 pm

    Looks like a butterfly, stings like VD. 🤣🤣🤣

    Reply
  56. krogdog says:
    June 9, 2018 at 4:58 pm

    I wonder how much truth is in that comment he made about the 1992 Dream Team. Here it is 25 years later and Spain has top athletes in just about every sport, LMAO

    Reply
  57. Sawyer Northrop says:
    June 21, 2018 at 1:06 am

    4 pl8

    Reply
  58. Fynn McFarland says:
    June 27, 2018 at 5:04 am

    3:05

    Reply
  59. stenbak88 says:
    August 7, 2018 at 10:52 am

    Suck a bag of tits China

    Reply
  60. BigOasis23 says:
    August 14, 2018 at 11:07 pm

    02:59

    Reply
  61. mystery man says:
    August 21, 2018 at 9:27 pm

    maybe his legs caved in like that, cuz he may have not had enough calcium in his diet . so his bones may have been weak at the time.

    Reply
  62. Jaiden Peters says:
    August 23, 2018 at 11:50 am

    Whoa whoa whoa, Whats with all this censor stuff it said there wouldn’t be

    Reply
  63. Ben says:
    August 23, 2018 at 5:41 pm

    Why was Mongoloid bleeped?

    Reply
  64. Just A Guy Production says:
    August 24, 2018 at 4:14 am

    Theres a shit load of bleeps for "uncensored".

    Reply
  65. Ryan Tepper says:
    August 24, 2018 at 6:57 am

    Back when this show used to be amazing

    Reply
  66. dantemike1 says:
    August 27, 2018 at 7:41 pm

    "…and impregnated half the bitches in Barcelona…" LOL!

    Reply
  67. Ghostreaperxx says:
    September 11, 2018 at 9:50 pm

    Kept repeating 2:13 🤣🤣

    Reply
  68. Joe Hartman says:
    September 25, 2018 at 2:23 am

    Get ready ladies and invertebrates I’m gonna teach you how to do the sponge

    Reply
  69. Scott Heers says:
    September 26, 2018 at 3:09 pm

    That white boy got no ass.

    Reply
  70. MJ 23 says:
    October 4, 2018 at 5:47 am

    That has to b my all time favorite clip..

    Reply
  71. J OConnell says:
    October 4, 2018 at 7:58 am

    The 'donk' when he hits himself with the javelin, pushing the ref over at the table tennis station, spike to the camera face and "…made Michael Phelps look like a lazy bitch…" LMMFAO!!!!!

    Reply
  72. Louis says:
    October 13, 2018 at 10:03 pm

    Lol it was actually kind of impressive.

    Reply
  73. daddyland says:
    October 28, 2018 at 7:29 am

    I am surprised he made that high jump…

    Reply
  74. Nomad 1-4 says:
    October 28, 2018 at 8:53 pm

    Why is it fucking censored? What the fuckity fuck you fucking bitchass liars

    Reply
  75. Matthew Demauro says:
    November 18, 2018 at 7:00 am

    nice to hold a man once in awhile

    Reply
  76. Mike Rotch says:
    November 22, 2018 at 12:45 am

    This audience sucks lol. This was brilliant, especially the announcers lines. Laugh more butt pirates!

    Reply
  77. Mike Rotch says:
    November 22, 2018 at 12:45 am

    “Suck a bag of tits China!”

    Reply
  78. Jinx says:
    December 20, 2018 at 2:41 am

    3:03 does he say t series
    he can tell the future

    Reply
  79. James Matthews says:
    December 27, 2018 at 9:27 pm

    That was impressive

    Reply
  80. Bobobo Bobobobo says:
    January 1, 2019 at 10:42 pm

    0:20
    Jet whip!

    Reply
  81. Menickc says:
    January 3, 2019 at 2:04 am

    at 3:02 did they say "take that T Series????"

    Reply
  82. Matthew Sandison says:
    January 3, 2019 at 3:02 am

    How is this uncensored? There are bleeps, that's the opposite

    Reply
  83. Robby Robby says:
    January 9, 2019 at 6:59 pm

    Uncensored my ASS!!! I heard a beep in there

    Reply
  84. Miguel Perez says:
    January 31, 2019 at 4:10 pm

    He forgot teakwondo and handball

    Reply
  85. Hank Henshaw says:
    February 12, 2019 at 9:02 pm

    I have my own version of the Olympics in the pool swim my fishys swim

    Reply
  86. gunfighterdrummer says:
    February 22, 2019 at 9:48 pm

    His sketches are brilliant!

    Reply
  87. Dick Taul says:
    February 28, 2019 at 3:05 am

    Did they say stop t series?

    Reply
  88. Uncle Creepy says:
    March 1, 2019 at 12:09 am

    Imagine how fast this could have been done if a man did it.

    Reply
  89. Brian Anshen says:
    March 23, 2019 at 2:28 am

    He forgot baseball

    Reply
  90. Brian Anshen says:
    March 25, 2019 at 12:21 am

    2:08 where I left off

    Reply
  91. Nicholas Horta says:
    May 23, 2019 at 2:51 pm

    Dam tosh is on point with his skills not bad

    Reply
  92. ApprenticeThatTextstooMuch says:
    June 10, 2019 at 2:54 am

    12 year old girl that won’t ever have a period. Lmao

    Reply
  93. J•ROK says:
    June 11, 2019 at 3:55 pm

    Yo, seriously, that shit was fuckin awesome. Beast mode 💪

    Reply
  94. BAM says:
    June 12, 2019 at 12:40 am

    (Uncensored) Tosh is the man. Rob dyerdek (how ever its spelt) is gay as shit

    Reply
  95. Trey Kashflow says:
    June 13, 2019 at 12:28 pm

    Yo tosh killed that shit on the low bra 🔥🔥🔥👽👽👽😂😂😂😂

    Reply
  96. monkeymanxxl says:
    June 19, 2019 at 4:46 am

    Suck a bag of tits China

    Reply
  97. Jaystings says:
    June 24, 2019 at 2:39 am

    Daniel is funny when he's a chode.

    Reply
  98. DJ Lee says:
    July 19, 2019 at 11:09 am

    At 3:24, he has an HK PSG-1. That like a $13k German sniper rifle. I'm pissed a liberal fruitcake like Tosh has a rifle I can only dream about owning. Now I hate him.

    Reply
  99. Harry Kuheim says:
    July 20, 2019 at 1:42 am

    Daniel would be good at the Trump Balls Sucking event…Bernie Blows…Trump 2020

    Reply
  100. Daz Bones says:
    July 31, 2019 at 3:20 am

    He gets to have a lot of fun.
    😃

    Reply

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